advice to teens. Auntie advice, Faye Arcand, self help, self improvement

How To Create More Positive Self Talk to Make Life Better

Today I was scrolling through blog posts when I tripped upon these words from one of my faves: MillennialLifeCrisis on WordPress. The entire blog post read:

“Maybe I’m not good enough. Maybe it is time I realize that.”

Twelve words are arranged in a sentence that screams, pulsates, and reverberates around the world. Nothing needs to be added. Everyone who reads those two sentences understands the pain, the confusion, and the fear they belie.

So powerful.

Have you ever thought you weren’t good enough? That you should just accept your imagined mediocrity? That it was time to face reality?

Questions arise though as to what you aren’t good enough FOR?

I‘m not sure what the young writer of these words was specifically referring to, but my brain immediately goes to …

I’m not good enough for the world.

I’m not good enough for him/her.

I’m not good enough to be recognized.

I’m not good enough to be worthy (of what? that raises more questions)

The list of questions could go on and on forever…

While I can look at the words and rationalize them as coming from someone who’s depressed or sad, the reality is, I’ve been there. Sometimes I still go there.

I’ve thought those same words. The Millennial writer is not alone in her feelings of despair or in the ultimate expression of wanting to surrender to the negativity we sometimes feel.

Here’s the thing though, unless we tell everyone, the others don’t know we’re giving up and chances are they’ve given up too. Does that make sense?

There are huge reminders all over social media saying things like: “You don’t know what someone is going through–be kind.” or “You’re not walking in their shoes…”

The person in the grocery store may have just found out her husband has cancer, the guy at the drycleaners may suffer from depression and is fighting to smile, the young boy at school may have witnessed violence in his home the night before… You simply don’t know.

The real-world lesson in all of this is that we’re all more alike than different.

My Millennial friend is having a down day (week? month?) but most of us regardless of age, financial status, race, gender identity, or any other ‘difference’ has probably had similar thoughts trickle across our path–sometimes the sneaky little buggers cling to our psyche and pull us down. Other times we can shake it off by asserting our stubborn strength and independence and not allow it to drag us down.

How do we get to the side of Self Empowerment?

Sometimes it’s a choice and other times you need assistance in building a bridge against those nasty, heavy, dark thoughts. Sometimes the bridge may be rickety and other times rock solid. But it’s yours to build in the name of personal growth, affirmations, and self-awareness.

I can tell you all now that you are good enough to do whatever you want to do but I want you to tell yourself. It needs to come from within.

I want you to write self-affirmations on stickies and post them around the house, in the fridge, on your water bottle, at your work station, in your car–wherever you frequent–so you’ll see and absorb the messages regularly.

Perhaps today it’s enough to know you’re not alone. Look at the person across from you in the coffee shop… I bet they have doubts about where they fit into the world too.

What would you say to them? Think about that.

Here are some samples of self-affirmations:

I AM ENOUGH
I AM a Caring, Giving, Generous Soul Worthy of Respect from Self and Others
I AM Not Alone I will Remember Everyone Has Doubts Sometimes
I AM Powerful and Deserve the Best of Life, Love, and Support
I AM Capable To Create My Own Change
I AM Making a Choice to be Happy and Successful in My Life
I AM Worthy and Deserving of Being WHO I AM
I AM Aware of My Strength to Make Healthy Choices
I AM Not Going to Allow Fear to Rule my Life
I AM a Unique Individual who Can Not Solve all the Problems of the World

So remember how powerful I said Millenial’s words were? I’m going to change just one word and it bears a whole new powerful message that can echo around the world.

“Maybe I’m good enough. Maybe it is time I realize that.”

Embrace the power within your own words and thoughts. Embrace the change.


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