For me the definition of gaslighting makes me think of politicians, door-to-door salesmen, and leaders of Ponzi schemes. All, to me, can be a bit slimy, manipulative, selfish, and protective of only their best interests.
If you've already committed to being child-free in your head and heart--that's okay-- but your partner needs to know long before the wedding or it's not fair to anyone. You need to be on the same page as your partner when it comes to these huge life decisions. Be real. Be mature. Share your truth.
Gaslighting is a term used to describe a form of psychological abuse where someone makes you doubt not only yourself and all you know, but also your sanity, your memory, and perceptions of reality.